British Blogger, Desi Dreamer, Mad Muslimah
// May 25th, 2009 // 5 Comments » // Blog
A TED video explaining how self-discipline can lead to success. Warning: the following film contains hilarious clips of kids trying their hardest not to eat free marshmallows. Wear some waterproof pants, if possible!
// April 1st, 2009 // 15 Comments » // Blog
I attended a workshop a couple of days ago, titled “Positive Presence and Image”, that aimed to help Muslim women create a greater personal impact within their professional environments.
The female instructor gave us several pieces of advice, but the one that stuck in my head the most was how to effectively communicate with male colleagues. A very important topic, considering that the workplace is still somewhat of a “man's world”.
// March 11th, 2009 // 3 Comments » // Blog
Yasir Qadhi's latest entry on MM reminded me of a slightly paranoid question that came to mind a while ago.
Jumu'ah is a significant day for Muslims, as the most important congregational prayer is held on that day, every week. But how do we know that the day we call “Friday” in the Gregorian weekly calendar is the same day that we call “Jumu'ah” in the Islamic calendar? Have Jumu'ah prayers really been held consistently, every seven days, since the time of the Prophet, peace be upon him? It's not like we can check using the Moon, like we do when determining the beginning and end of the Islamic calendar months.
I suppose the same question applies to every day of the week, seeing as Mondays and Thursday have special significance with regards to the practice of ritual, Sunnah fasts.
I can trust that the Arabs have it right, from the point of view of uninterrupted tradition. So when the Gregorian calendar was introduced to the Muslim world, did they simply synch the two systems, noting that Friday was equivalent to Jumu'ah? I guess it wouldn't be very difficult, seeing as both weeks contain seven days. Imagine the chaos otherwise?!
Okay, now I suspect that my question is very silly indeed. :/
// March 3rd, 2009 // 9 Comments » // Blog
This rantish piece was originally intended as an email response. I then realized that I was 'blogging' at the recipient. Blog rants belong on blog posts. Hence my decision to paste it below for public viewing:
Well, if I was happy to stay in research, I wouldn't have a problem finding a job either, Allahu 'alam.
It's because I cannot tolerate that claustrophobic, isolating environment any longer, that I decided to look elsewhere for employment.
Unfortunately, I am quite clueless as to what I should concentrate on in the long term. I have to factor in the remote possibility of future wifely and motherly duties, which realistically, precludes the pursuit of any career that demands a great deal of my time and energy. This is not helped by the dearth of part-time jobs in my sector (the ones I find are either managerial roles for which I am underqualified, or technician jobs for which I am overqualified).
Add to that the fact that this is the first time I am job seeking as an “obvious” Muslimah (i.e., avec hijab), which does actually put some employers off.
Then there is the debate about whether Muslim women should be in the Western workplace at all. Yes, I do think about such things, and definitely don't miss the regular angst of 'handshaking' incidents, and having to constantly reign in my blabber-mouth personality in front of the opposite gender, all of whom so far have been non-Muslim, and thus don't usually understand the internal conflict that their “friendly” behaviour (and even antagonistic behaviour, at times) can pose for me.
I know I'm not the only one going through this. But my point is that I'd like people to cut me some slack.
Alhamdulillah, I am not in debt. I live at home with parents who can afford to house me. Indeed, if it wasn't for the pressure that they're placing on me, I wouldn't even bother looking for a conventional job. I am happy to tell friends and strangers that I am officially unemployed, but spend my time on other important pursuits – leaving the exact details vague, so as not to show off.
In fact, the only two things that I miss from my eleven years of working are:
Yes, it's a little embarrassing that a woman with three degrees, and the title “Dr” before her name should be unemployed, and more than that, is now facing a problem that most people sorted out in their late-teens/early 20s: the question of “What should I do with my life?”.
However, the embarrassment factor is relative. People make me feel ashamed, by inferring that I have something to be ashamed off.
Did I purposely pick the wrong career path, so I'd end up in this position? Err, no…
Could I have thought about it more before deciding to pursue a PhD? Err, maybe? Allāh knows best. Hindsight is 20/20, after all.
I am not looking for anyone's sympathy. More like: I want to be left alone. Unless you have a real job to offer me; then hey, I am all ears! Other than that, general concern is welcome, but making me feel small, and a bit useless, is not. Maybe I am being overly sensitive, but there you go.
// February 7th, 2009 // 11 Comments » // Blog
I have recently discovered something about myself.
I really don't like to be labeled.
I am not referring to my Islam (i.e., Sunni, Salafi, Shi'a, etc.). Rather, me, as a person.
// January 4th, 2009 // 3 Comments » // Blog
Many would agree that death is a greater problem for the living, than for those who have actually passed on. Muslims find solace in the prayer that their loved ones are at peace, in a “better place”, no longer suffering. This is especially true for those who died in a state of innocence, such as children, and the oppressed.
However, we, the owners of hearts that still beat, are left to grieve, to feel the pain that resides deep in our cores; a wound that opens every time we realize the absence of the ones whom we loved.
// December 2nd, 2008 // 8 Comments » // Blog
I'll admit: when I am upset, I don't always turn to the right places for comfort. The kitchen is usually my first port of call. Sometimes sleep. Sometimes friends.
But what happens when your stomach doesn't fill?
And your brain refuses to switch off?
And friends don't pick up the phone?
// November 22nd, 2008 // 19 Comments » // Blog
Whilst a budding Biology undergraduate, I wasted many an afternoon in the computer room, filling out pointless online personality tests, such as: “Which Icecream Flavour Are You?”. I think I was Raspberry Ripple – whatever that means. Or is that my favourite flavour? I forget.
Thus I was quite keen to visit a site I just discovered via Marahm's blog, called Typelyzer, which – simply put – is a personality quiz that requires you to answer just one question:
What's your blog address?
Obviously, it's a service that is only open to the blogging 'elite' (all several million of us).
This is what it had to say about moi:
// November 14th, 2008 // 8 Comments » // Blog
I assigned myself the somewhat derogatory title of “The Leech” during my PhD years, when I noticed a potentially annoying personal behaviour.
When faced with a problem, I used one of two 'extreme' paths in my search for a solution.
Where I suspected that I knew enough to fix the problem myself, I was very secretive, independent, and head strong. Even if someone offered me advice (though it would not have been requested), I'd politely listen to them, but in my head I was thinking:
“Yeah, yeah, I already knew that.
“No, that won't work.
“Please, just let me get on with it!”.
I think it had something to do with trying to 'prove' myself; either to my supervisors, or just as an ego rush. This behaviour lead to me wasting six months on an experiment, that never yielded any results. I kept repeating and repeating the assay, and I would report my work regularly, but I never actually thought to sit down and talk to someone about why I was failing so consistently; I was that determined to solve the problem myself.
One supervisor openly chastised me for this, and I think the embarrassment from that experience, combined with the frustration of having clearly wasted so much time, caused me to swing the other way completely. Thus, 'the Leech' was born.
Now, every time I had a problem, even a tiny one, I would seek human intervention. It didn't matter whether there were manuals written on the subject, or in-depth how-tos posted online; I still needed reassurance from someone more experienced in that field, to make sure that I didn't mess up to that extent again. I am surprised no-one ran away from me in the hall ways, screaming:
“Noooo… I have given all I have to give! You have sucked my brain dryyyy!”.
// November 13th, 2008 // 3 Comments » // Blog
I've been reading about the Rwandan Genocide for the past hour… I can't describe how I feel right now. My guts… feel liquid.
To think that anyone in power could sit back and allow anything close to that to happen again… words fail me.
Maybe this time, it's not about ethnic genocide.
Maybe it's just about diamonds and coal.
But right now, dark-skinned women are having to make a choice:
Stay in squalid camps and let their babies starve.
Or return to rebel-controlled lands and face gang rape.
Some have already faced both.
Subhanallah… how?
How do they sleep?
How do they sip their morning coffee?
Kiss their wives on the cheek, and pat their children goodbye.
Sit in leather-clad offices.
And do absolutely nothing to stop this madness.
I… just don't know what to say.
Sign the Avaaz Petition: STAND WITH THE PEOPLE OF CONGO
Make dua. Now. Please.
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