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For my best friend, SimSim.

Drawn using a Wacom Bamboo Pen in Adobe Illustrator CS5.

“Love for other people what you love for yourself and you will be a (perfect) Muslim.” – Prophet Muhammed, sallalahu ‘alayhi wa salam

An extraordinary example of putting this teaching into practice is that of some of our righteous predecessors.

Ibrahim al-Nakha’ee (rahimahullah) was a’war al-‘ayn (blind in one eye), and his student Sulayman ibn Mihran suffered from weak eyesight (a’mash al-‘ayn). Ibn al-Jawzi related a story about them in his book Al-Muntathim that they were walking in the streets of Al-Kufah headed to the masjid.

As they were walking, Imam Al-Nakha’ee said, “Sulayman, can you take one road and I take another? For I fear that if we were to pass together by the foolish people, they would say, ‘A’war – one eyed – is leading an a’mash – bleary eyed- (through the road) and they would then have backbitten us and fallen into sins.”

So Sulayman replied, “O Abu ‘Imran! What is wrong then when we are rewarded while they are sinful?”

Ibrahim al-Nakha’ee replied, “SubhanaAllah! Bal naslam wa yaslamun! Rather, that we be safe (from their backbiting) and they be safe (of sin) is better than if we are rewarded and they are sinful!”.

[al-Muntathim fee Tareekh al Muluk wal Umam]

This is a form of altruism that we all desperately need to adopt. There is a lot of bitterness, enmity and ill-will amongst us. We need to improve ourselves and one another with a far more loving attitude. May Allah make it easy for us, ameen.

The good news is, on my way home from uni this afternoon, I discovered my camera in my coat pocket. Thus I was finally able to capture some shots of the Natural History Museum ice rink, which I’ve been eager to do ever since it was set up a few weeks ago.

The last shot is my favourite… I think it would make a nice postcard. Btw, am I alone in thinking ice skating is the most romantic of the winter sports? All that huddling, cuddling and giggling… Sigh.

Happy Eid, everybody!

About a month ago I dreamt that I was on a journey with someone – a man; someone I’m somewhat familiar with in real life. We had stopped somewhere en route, and were using the computer room.

Swinging round in my swivel chair, I came to face to face with a young boy, maybe six years old or so. I said “hi”, in the kind of gentle way that you would with a small child… but for some unknown reason, he responded by launching into an unannounced bear hug! It felt like the type of sincere embrace that a child would give if they were scared, lonely, and needed reassurance.

I didn’t know the boy at all, but I was so moved by this simple gesture, by his implicit trust in me, that I couldn’t let go. As his chest lay upon mine, I felt my heart beat so strongly – almost painfully. I suspected that someone had abandoned him there, and that he had latched onto me like a lost puppy, hoping that I would love him. The whole experience evoked such a powerful maternal instinct in me; I just knew in my bones that I was meant to protect him.

I turned to my travel companion (whilst still engaged in the bear hug), who was sat on a nearby terminal. And as soon as I did, I saw a little girl do the exact same thing to him! I knew – as one usually ‘knows’ in dreams – that the little girl was the little boy’s sister. They had both been abandoned.

We carried the children to our car – a large, black 4 x 4. I was so sad. I wanted to take them with us. I wanted to make them mine, and never let them be alone again. In the background, I listened to my companion share his opinions on how unfortunate the whole situation was… but I could tell without asking that he was unwilling to take the children. He was being the sensible man; I, the emotional woman – though I reluctantly understood his perspective, and didn’t argue. I remember the solemn look on my face, and how I secretly hoped that it would be enough to make him change his mind.

Well, it seemed to have worked! Because as the dream advanced to the next ‘scene’, it was several years in the future. The travel companion and I were now married (I assume we weren’t before), and the children were ours.

There was more to the dream, which has now been forgotten, and so I assume it was less significant. The strangest part, however, happened after I awoke. I made the opening takbir for Fajr salat. I went to place my hands on my chest, and subhanallah, I felt the same strong, painful, feeling of empathy in my heart, as I did during my embrace with the little, lost child.

As I prayed, I wept. All for the love of my dream boy.

“Bear in mind that the present life is just a game, a diversion, an attraction, a cause of boasting among you, of rivalry in wealth and children.” Qur’an 57:20

I don’t think I ever really appreciated the sense of rivalry that Allah mentions in the above verse (and elsewhere in the Qur’an), until very, very recently. I’m talking, the last two months or so. It sort of crept up over me, maybe because nearly every singleton in my life has suddenly gotten married, with other newly weds having babies, that I feel somewhat left behind in the personal life department.

A few years ago, I was on a quest to get married – but it was more like an adventure; one that I shared with friends and cousins. Alhamdulillah, one by one, my travelling companions left for the next stage of their journey, and we waved them off happily, so secure in our knowledge that we, too, would be moving ahead very soon.

Returning to the present, it seems that I am one of the few passengers left behind in the waiting room, wondering why my train is running so late. Shouldn’t it have been here by now? Did I miss it? Maybe I read the timetable wrong?

And worst of all, I’ve become one of them. You know… the ‘older’ unmarried women, that the younger unmarried women use to make themselves feel better: “Oh, at least I’m not as old as so-n-so”. They become so shocked when they hear my marital status combined with my age. That is, until they realize the expression of disapproval at their tactlessness on my face, and try to cover it up with: “Oh, it’ll happen soon, insha’Allah”. Yes, thank you. I feel totally reassured now.

Anyway, believe it or not, I’m not complaining about my fate. And if I did, I wouldn’t be complaining to you. Rather, I wanted to share how one’s perspective on the Qur’an changes with new life experiences. Now I actually feel the sting of rivalry in my heart from time to time. But the verse above reminds me of the bigger picture: it’s only a game, Mehzabeen. So be a good sport, and play it well.

Anyway, I don’t have much to say about it all. Partly because I was asked to film it, so I was too busy paying attention to my camera, to soak in much of anything. I can tell you that it was a very mature, rational discussion, masha’Allah; there wasn’t really any kind of ‘debate’ as such, as all the speakers pretty much agreed with one another (even though the panel consisted of Muslims and a non-Muslim, men and women – “Yey!” for social harmony).

However, one tidbit that made a lasting impression, was offered by the entertaining, yet informative, Imam Shahnawaz Haque (Psychotherapist, Teacher and Khatib), in response to an audience member asking why all the attention was being placed on the deficiencies of men – what about women’s deficiencies?

The imam reminded us not to play the ‘blame game’, but instead to take responsibility for our own actions; to look inward and improve ourselves before complaining about the faults of our spouse. To illustrate this, he referred to the following Qur’anic stories:

28 Behold! thy Lord said to the angels: “I am about to create man, from sounding clay from mud moulded into shape;
29 “When I have fashioned him (in due proportion) and breathed into him of My spirit, fall ye down in obeisance unto him.”
30 So the angels prostrated themselves, all of them together:
31 Not so Iblis: he refused to be among those who prostrated themselves.
32 ((Allah)) said: “O Iblis! what is your reason for not being among those who prostrated themselves?”
33 (Iblis) said: “I am not one to prostrate myself to man, whom Thou didst create from sounding clay, from mud moulded into shape.”
34 ((Allah)) said: “Then get thee out from here; for thou art rejected, accursed.
35 “And the curse shall be on thee till the day of Judgment.”
36 (Iblis) said: “O my Lord! give me then respite till the Day the (dead) are raised.”
37 ((Allah)) said: “Respite is granted thee
38 “Till the Day of the Time appointed.”
39 (Iblis) said: “O my Lord! because Thou hast put me in the wrong, I will make (wrong) fair-seeming to them on the earth, and I will put them all in the wrong,-
40 “Except Thy servants among them, sincere and purified (by Thy Grace).”

Surah 15: Al Hijr

19 “O Adam! dwell thou and thy wife in the Garden, and enjoy (its good things) as ye wish: but approach not this tree, or ye run into harm and transgression.”
20 Then began Satan to whisper suggestions to them, bringing openly before their minds all their shame that was hidden from them (before): he said: “Your Lord only forbade you this tree, lest ye should become angels or such beings as live for ever.”
21 And he swore to them both, that he was their sincere adviser.
22 So by deceit he brought about their fall: when they tasted of the tree, their shame became manifest to them, and they began to sew together the leaves of the garden over their bodies. And their Lord called unto them: “Did I not forbid you that tree, and tell you that Satan was an avowed enemy unto you?”
23 They said: “Our Lord! We have wronged our own souls: If thou forgive us not and bestow not upon us Thy Mercy, we shall certainly be lost.”

Surah 7: Al-Araf

Pay attention to the words in bold, as here lies a key difference between Iblis, the accursed, and our blessed ancestors, Adam and Eve (peace be upon them both): when Iblis messed up, he – out of sheer arrogance and ingratitude – blamed Allah, subhanahu wa ta’ala, for his own disobedience – and only a moment after Allah granted his request for respite! However, when Adam and Eve realized the error of their ways, they immediately took responsibility for their own incorrect action, and humbly begged Allah for forgiveness.

So, whose footsteps are we going to follow? The one who has been cursed until the Day of Resurrection, or those whom Allah forgave, and raised in status, to be the best of creation?

—

I had never heard this explanation before, and it really brightened my day to have such well-known ayaat presented to me in a refreshingly new light. I pray that the lesson therein remains with me always… Ameen!

I’ll be extracting the audio from the event’s footage, and sending it to the organizers soon, insha’Allah. I’ll let you know if/when they decide to publish it.

]]> http://imuslim.tv/2009/07/10/dont-play-shaytaans-blame-game/feed/ 10 http://imuslim.tv/2009/05/07/love/ http://imuslim.tv/2009/05/07/love/#comments Thu, 07 May 2009 16:05:00 +0000 iMuslim http://imuslim.tv/?p=1882

These Love Hearts were part of the goody bag that I received at my PhD graduation yesterday. I didn’t expect something so corny from a university as sophisticated as Imperial College. :)